What change, big or small, would you like your blog to make in the world?
The vision was simple for this blog. Share my knowledge and experience surrounding epilepsy so that others may feel empowered and seen. The stigma surrounding epilepsy continues to hold much misconception.
How little did I know that my commitment to the blog only fed my feelings of failure. The fatigue of my chronic illness didn’t allow me to write on the manner and as often as I originally envisioned.
White lilacs and the color purple represent epilepsy awareness
So often with chronic illness, life drastically changes, and you find that you can no longer do something that you used to do with ease. This may not be the grand writings that I imagined, but it’s what I can do right now.
Perhaps someday, as medicine and technology advances, I will be able to do more.
If you are interested in learning more about epilepsy visit my frequently asked questions post to become informed and help stop the stigma.
Epilepsy will never be cured. Especially mine, not in my lifetime, not this intractable, unknown caused, epileptic brain.
All living things are mortal- life is too short, live and enjoy it while you can. Go explore, learn, and experience while you still have the capacity to.
The Second Law of Thermodynamics – The Second Law is often cited as the reason for the “arrow of time.” The universe is observed to be evolving from a state of lower entropy (the Big Bang) to a state of higher entropy, giving time a direction. In simpler terms, heat flows from hotter to colder environments. This is how I keep myself warm, by sucking the warmth out of others.
Change is constant – you are a speck on top of a world rotating around the sun. This sun is rotating around a universe, rotating around a galaxy rotating around a solar system rotating several galaxies. All plunging through space together because… we exploded together. That is wild to think about. So technically on a base level, you are truly forever in motion. So if someone tells you to “get off the couch and get moving” you can tell them you have! But I wouldn’t recommend the response unless you want to keep your job, relationship, or allowance.
You are reading this sentence. This is a direct, undeniable experience you are having right now. At some point, you had past experiences that led you here. And you will make choices from this moment that will influence your path forward. Your life is partially a creation of your choices.
Photo by Sergio Scandroglio
Every person is unique. Even those who share the same DNA. Their perspective and their communication is entirely their own and should be respected within reason.
To learn, you must admit you do not know. This is extremely difficult, especially as you become more well versed in a subject and your ego gets in the way.
The energy spent on the focus of what others may think is useless. It is very likely that they are spending a lot less time thinking about you than what you are assuming they are. Dress, put on makeup, dance for you, no one else.
You can only control your own emotions, actions, and decisions.
Beliefs should conform to one’s best scientific understanding of the world. One should take care never to distort scientific facts to fit one’s beliefs. – TST
“The Greatest Thing, You’ll Ever Learn, Is Just to Love, And Be Loved, In Return.” – Nature Boy by Nat King Cole
Your thoughts?
Do you agree with any of the above? Why or why not?
My formal education background is in STEM. I grew up in a household where there was always analysis and a solution. Naturally, when there is a problem in my life, whether it be professional, romantic, or fiscal, I approach it with logic.
Recently, I have started to watch the show Mr. Robot. If you happen to never have heard of it, it is about a young man, Elliot, with social anxiety who works in cyber security, yet is a vigilante hacker. He is very against corporate America despite working for it. He falls into an intense situation where his morals are questioned. I refuse to give any spoilers, but so far the show is phenomenal.
It’s all just 1s and 0s
At one point in the show Mr. Robot is telling Elliot that life does not have any grey areas; It is all 1s and 0s. This has been a concept I have been struggling with for some time.
Not because I disagreed, but because I agreed.
Photo by Rada Aslanova
Let me give you an example using my relationships. I’d perform an assessment, and if I detected – or if the other person vocalized – anything less than 100% commitment, a “1,” I would end the relationship immediately. There was no grey area: if it wasn’t a “1,” it was a “0,” a complete “out.” I refused to dedicate my energy to a relationship lacking that full investment. Some might interpret this as Anxious-Avoidant Attachment, though I haven’t undergone any formal assessment.
Security or Adventure?
Recently, my binary approach has been thrown into question. Security and adventure are not mutually exclusive. As my partner says, it’s about balance.
I am seeking security and adventure. It is possible to have a reliable relationship with emotional stability with somebody who you can share wonderful adventures. I know it exists.
The ideal blend of the two will likely change as life progresses, and priorities change. But I plan to be intentional on not letting my binary approach let my pursuit of stability undermine my need for adventure and stifle my love for growth and learning.
What Are Your Thoughts?
Do you see the world in 1s and 0s? Do you prefer to live in the grey?
What could you let go of, for the sake of harmony?
Getting a diagnosis of a chronic illness, or even experiencing an injury that fundamentally alters your life’s path, can be absolutely devastating. The initial shock, the grief, the fear – these are powerful emotions that are unlikely to remain static. Your feelings today are not what they were yesterday, and they will almost certainly evolve in the months and years to come.
My first piece of advice is simple: take things day by day.
Photo by @epil_epsy_ogue
It takes time to process such a monumental shift. For me, it took five years to truly begin resetting my way of thinking. I had once made plans to move far away, back to a place I’d lived before, but that location was distant from my family and my vital support system. My career aspirations also underwent a radical transformation. As I came to terms with the possibility that I might never drive again, I began researching careers that significantly reduced the need for me to be driven frequently.
This journey is one of constant development. It’s about gently letting go of who you used to be, and with it, all your original plans and expectations. This isn’t an ending; it’s a powerful shift. “This is who I am now,” I tell myself, “and I am okay with it.”
It will indeed be a long journey, filled with days that are better than others. And it’s perfectly okay to not be okay! Feelings of frustration, disappointment, and even anger are normal.
There will be things you once enjoyed doing that you can no longer participate in, and it is right and healthy to mourn those losses. But remember, you are still that same great person. Your contributions to the world may simply take a different form. You can absolutely still be a dignified, social, and beautiful person, despite an illness.
In the context of these feelings, achieving harmony refers to a state of inner peace and balance that can exist despite challenging external circumstances or waves of negative emotions. I admit, this is far easier said than done.
Photo by Shiva Smyth
It’s about cultivating an equilibrium within yourself, where diverse emotions, thoughts, and experiences can coexist without spiraling into internal conflict or distress. This often involves practicing positive self-talk, leaning into your core beliefs, and grounding yourself with the support of friends and family to maintain a stable emotional state.
For the sake of this inner harmony, I am actively working to let go of my expectations of perfection for my future. I encourage you to join me on this journey.
How would you answer the question above? Let me know in the comments.
I am the epitome of idleness; not because I am lazy but because of my chronic illness. My uncontrolled epilepsy causes multiple seizures throughout the day and status epilepticus at night, leading to constant exhaustion. Even a simple task can consume all my energy, let alone anything physical. Just existing uses up more energy than the average person.
So I challenged myself to stretch every day for 31 days, to see if it could make a difference. Now, 31 days does not create a habit. It takes anywhere from 18 to 254 days, as science suggests. Nonetheless, I wanted to try to condition my body to a point that stretching wouldn’t seem like extra effort.
What does stretching do to your body?
The muscles are a fascinating fiber in our body. When we stretch, the fibers have the ability to maintain elongation, unlike a rubber band that just snaps back to its original shape. However, to maintain that elongation, regular movement within that range is necessary.
As we age, the elastic fibers in our body regenerate less effectively, causing a reduction in movement range and muscle stiffness. Thus, movement and stretching become increasingly important as we grow older. For more information on the significance of movement, check out my other article Movement Matters.
Week 1
Initially I was unsure of how to begin. With no established routine, I was randomly stretching exercises. Then, I discovered a free app called Female Fitness – Women Workout. It offers targeted stretching routines such as full body, morning warm up, sleepy time stretch, and even splits training. It was the perfect place to start for the person who lacked direction. I also found a YouTuber who specialized in stretching techniques which allowed me to gain more knowledge along my journey. Below, is one of his videos of a easy 10 minute stretch, for any skill level, if you are interested in checking out his content.
Week 2
During this week, something surprising happened – I began to look forward to stretching. I found myself taking breaks to stretch my body, and even found ways to incorporate stretching while working. At this point I had established an actual stretch routine. Here were my rules:
Engage my entire body in stretching – this did not apply to the stretches I did while I was still actively working at my computer or doing another activity. This meant I was dedicating time to actually do a full body stretch.
No time restrictions. – I wanted to stretch until I felt good, not until the clock/timer said I was done.
I stretched to discomfort, not pain. Once the discomfort disappeared, I would push a little further.
Week 3
By week three, a shift occurred in my mindset. I no longer needed the distraction of YouTube to complete a stretching session. It was the first time my body had moved since my brain surgery, and I never rebuilt an emotional connection to physical movement. But when I focused on how I felt, physically and emotionally as I flowed from one position to the next, I realized it was a peaceful experience.
After consistent stretching, I began to see physical results. I even noticed a significant difference in my overall flexibility. Am I ready to join Cirque Du Soleil? I think not. But incorporating movement into my day made a difference. Even the smallest amount of movement of our body can increase blood and fluid supply to our bodies. The small results I achieved during these 31 days have motivated me to continue stretching beyond this challenge.
What kinds of benefits do you find from stretching? I would love to hear about your stretching routine, leave it in the comments below!
Spirits were high. One by one, co workers, friends, and my family were getting vaccinated. There were the range of reactions. Some people were incapacitated by their flu-like symptoms, and others felt almost nothing. But one thing that everyone had in common, is that the second dose was an intensified version of the first.
Regardless, we finally felt as if things were moving forward, towards an end to this devastating pandemic.
The first vaccine was administered indoors 😷 and precautions were taken seriously. Side effect was body pain, but luckily no fever, or feeling sick.
After my initial dose, the department of health informed me once the booster became available. The email came more quickly than I expected.
The Department of Health scheduled my appointment at the same location as the first shot. It was within the 28day range; I didn’t even have to do the math! Easy peasy. 👍
Saturday
Although it was the same location, the set up was different. It was a drive through, when the initial dose was administered indoors.
Drive through vaccine?! I thought, What an age we live in! 👏
Two separate lines of cars filtered through two tents, ending at 4 people administering the vaccine. It was much more relaxing, being in my own space, with the comfort of our SUV’s heated seats.
As we pulled up to get the shot, I immediately wished I had put more thought into how to get my arm in a place where she could access it.
In a quick decision I draped my arm out the window so it would be easier for her to get to. It was a terrible decision.
The angle of my arm left my muscle in an award position, and didn’t let it relax fully. She inserted the needle and it ripped through a bit of muscle. As the plunger was pushed, the liquid shot too deep and I could feel fibers of my muscle separating. I knew I was doomed for a long recovery for the arm pain.
It was not her fault at all. It was all me, because I didn’t plan ahead, or simpler yet, let her guide me.
A parking lot adjacent was the area for the 15 minute waiting period. A nurse gave us the batch lot number to fill in my vaccine information card. The other cars in the waiting area probably thought I was dancing the YMCA because I was trying to work my muscles, hoping it would make it feel less terrible the next day. 🕺
Sunday
04:30 am. Woke up with terrible whole body pain. The CBD cream wasn’t enough. It was time to bring out the heavy hitter: 200 mg of Ibuprofen. Laying down was terrible, but I could hardly hold up my own weight if I stood. The minutes crawled by as I waited for the IBU to kick in. When it did, I was able to fall back asleep.
My partner woke me up at 8 to take another pain reliever, and I immediately fell asleep on the couch. I woke up again just to go back to bed. A bit of food and maintaining the pain reliever schedule helped enough to be able to sit outside and enjoy the lovely day. I took a few more naps that day; my body was working too hard to expect any more from it.
Monday
02:30 a.m. The dog went out to pee and one of our neighborhood skunks was in our yard. After that adrenaline rush subsided, I realized that although I felt significantly better, my elbows, hips, and knees were still very sore. So much so that a Tylenol was needed to let me fall back asleep.
09:00 a.m. Thank goodness work started late today. The morning shower definitely took longer than usual just because my body was still not 💯. It was a staff meeting Monday, meaning zero physical exertion, just mental. Apparently that was too much. I had to turn my video off and lay on the couch and just listen to the meeting, twice. My boss knew I was struggling with the after effects of the vaccine, and has been so understanding to all of her staff as we struggle with our shots.
Tuesday
A bit of sore knees, hips, and elbows, but nothing tylenol couldn’t help. By the afternoon, I was giddy just because I felt like me again!
Overview
As expected, the symptoms were the same with the first dose, but with more intensity. Sticking to a pain reliever routine was greatly beneficial. I pushed fluids to help defend against possible fever.
Overall, I am very thankful for my opportunity to receive the vaccine. This is a small step towards a common, world goal. Being vaccinated has me daydreaming even more about what thing I am going to do when things get back to “normal.”
Have you gotten your COVID 19 vaccine first or second dose? Did you have a different reaction the first and second time? Let us know in the comments.
Phase 1a of implementation of vaccine is available to healthcare workers. This is a category that I happened to fall under. The following is my experience as a person living with uncontrolled, medication resistant epilepsy, and recommendations based upon that experience.
Consulting with my neurologist, he assured people with epilepsy who are receiving the vaccine are not experiencing any new/different side effects than those without the condition.
Fever, fatigue, and pain are triggers to my seizures and they are the most common side effects of the vaccine. My nurse requested that I monitor my temperature and any symptoms and report back. She asked if she could share my experience to others with epilepsy if they had questions. (Of course I said yes. That is the purpose of this blog: to share my experience in hopes it helps at least one person.)
We made a seizure action plan.
The vaccine appointment was scheduled as early in the day as possible. That way if any symptoms arose, or I had questions, I would have my primary care & neurologist available.
My partner was lucky enough to get the day of the vaccine (Friday) off of work so that he could monitor my well-being. Having fatigue be a concern, I appreciated having the weekend to be able to recover.
We also made sure we had a fresh refill of my rescue medication. It would be on standby in the event of increased seizure activity with the development of any side effects.
Although allergic reactions to the vaccine are rare, we had the epi pen at the ready. There are many medications that I have developed an allergy to, but no vaccines.
But when I say the allergic reactions are rare with the vaccine, I mean rare. Out of the 1.9 million people who got the Pfizer vaccine in December, only 21 people developed anaphylaxis. *
I kept in mind my “why”
It may have seemed like I had everything under control with all the planning, but sadly that was not the case. Sleep was difficult because of my anxiety. My ambivalence almost caused me to cancel the appointment. I second guessed myself on if it was safe with my epilepsy to get it in phase one. Expectation and anticipation of the unknown were the key to my misery (it always is).
Should I wait for more people to get it before I am willing to subject myself to this new thing? What is more frightening, the vaccine or COVID itself? (Answer: Getting COVID unprotected)
The day before the appointment, I had a breakthrough in clarity. I have a responsibility, to myself, to my family, to my friends, to the WORLD, to keep us all safe. Getting the vaccine would be my small contribution. Not everyday do I get to help save the word. 🌎
Thinking about it that way, helped me feel empowered, and thankful that I had the opportunity to receive the vaccine. It would be selfish of me to wait. Next, I had to help calm my anxiety.
I did research
Both vaccines are made from messenger RNA. This mRNA is a generic blueprint given to your body. You can imagine it works kind of like giving a mugshot to your immune system of the bad guy (COVID-19) it needs to protect your body from. Once your immune system recognizes that bad guy, if it interacts with it later, your immune system is prepared. Even though it’s genetic material, the vaccine itself does not alter your genes, and turn you into the next *insert you preferred genetically modified superhero here*. However, it does encourage your body to pump some new security codes into your system.
The beauty of using the mRNA method is that your body does the work to protect itself. Because of that, the vaccine can be produced much faster than other methods. For example, the flu shot viruses have to be grown in chicken eggs, then harvested, then deactivated, then purified. That all takes 6 months before ever getting close to you. And that method had been refined after decades of experience.
Moderna had an efficacy of 94.5% and Pfizer of 90% during phase 3 trials. ** Those efficacy numbers are outstanding. Comparing back to the flu shot, it usually only reduces risk about 60% (but there are many strands of flu we are working against).
Day of the vaccine 💉 (Friday)
Appointment time was 08:30. It was 31 farenheit and there were not enough portable heaters. Dallas, my medical alert dog, was shivering as if to shake the frost off his body. My co-worker was ahead of me in line. Just being able to wave goofily at each other was surprisingly comforting.
The line moved smoothly, and much more quickly than I was anticipating.My husband stayed with me in the line outside until I got inside with only 4 people ahead of me. The makeshift space was entered through an emergency exit door. A line of chair backs was used as a check in space. The normal check in window had make shift protection on the openings. I let out an audible giggle as to how awkward, but oddly efficient everything was.
The nurse giving the injection was so skilled that I didn’t feel the needle, only the pressure of of the fluid entering my body. I had to reassure nurse Crystal that I had my epi pen, rescue med, and inhaler. She emphasized the importance of staying the full 15 minutes for monitoring.
I noticed others leaving early. But it is important to be honest with reporting all symptoms and drugs (prescribed or otherwise) so healthcare providers can make suggestions to keep you safe. I stayed the full 15; I felt fine.
My goal for the day was to push fluids and monitor myself. A few hours later my arm started to feel sore, but no more than a flu shot does.
By the end of the night my arm was so sore it’s range of motion was at 80% it’s usual. The only irritation around the injection site was from the band-aid (and it wasn’t even a cool power ranger one 😞).
Day after the vaccine (Saturday)
I woke up feeling like I had climbed Everest the day before. My body was sore, my joints ached, there was no using my right arm. Sitting hurt, so I would stand. Standing hurt, so I would walk. Walking took so much effort that I would get tired and have to sit right back down. Fatigue is not a stranger to me, but that was different.
I didn’t want to use any pain reliever, especially a fever reducer. My body was working hard to help me against COVID-19, and there was no way I was going to interrupt that process by introducing other chemicals.
However, suffering wasn’t a requirement. Out came the CBD balm. If we could have drawn a bath of it, I would have dipped myself in. Every joint and muscle, and even the tender right arm was covered.
CBD is magic. By the end of the day I was able to do dishes with little pain (darn, didn’t have an excuse to avoid them anymore). We have no dishwashing machine, so I was able to scrub with vigor thanks to the CBD. 💪
Day 2 after vaccine (Sunday)
Woke up after quite a restful night. The tenderness in the vaccine arm was negligible; about as much as a flu shot. The fatigue I experienced was easily cared by having a relaxed, no chore Sunday. Overall, a darn good day even by my epilepsy standpoint!
Day 3 after vaccine (Monday)
My neuro nurse anticipated this would be the last day of any extra soreness or fatigue. Soreness only was noticed when squeezing my arm. There was some fatigue that seemed more than my usual. Being back at work in addition to the fatigue caused an increase in my seizure activity. Feeling so well the day before caused me to disregard the possibility of needing to take it easy. However, I considered myself in the clear from the possibility of detrimental side effects.
Now it is just a matter of waiting the 28 days for the booster!
Summary/ Recommendations
Consult with your physician about your health condition when considering the vaccine.
Having a specified seizure action plan helped with managing anxiety as well as preparing for the physical.
Keep in mind your reasons for getting the injection.
Extreme soreness was able to be controlled by topical pain creme.
No behavior/medication change besides extra intake of fluids.
Increased fatigue can be treated/managed in the same ways as you do with your normal amount of fatigue.
If working during the recovery days, allow yourself extra breaks, and don’t forget to monitor yourself.
Are you planning on getting vaccinated? Any questions on the experience that you would like to ask? Let us know in the comments.
As a reminder, I am not a certified medical professional. The above is not intended to be used in place of professional medical advice. You should always consult with your healthcare physician prior to making any medical decisions.
My chronic illness causes constant fatigue. My body is battling itself from the inside, and it’s hard to deal with anything on the outside. Housework falls by the wayside; it is just too hard to make things happen. Everyday I got to see things getting piled up larger and larger, waiting for the time that I felt good enough to do something about it. And that time rarely comes.
One day I took a good long look at my house, and my life, and finally decided I needed to do something drastic to help me. What I ended up looking in to, was minimalism. At first I thought, “how ridiculous? I love the majority of my items in my home, I will never be able to part with them. I should just give up now.”
As I read, I found minimalism didn’t mean living with nothing, it meant living with less.
Research shows brain fatigue increases when it has to process more in an environment. Brain fatigue means body fatigue. Studies have found that clutter in a space raises cortisol levels. Cortisol is your stress hormone. Therefore clutter hits you with a double whammy, to your physical and mental health.
The more I thought about it, the more it started to look good for my epileptic brain. With things being simplified and reduced in my house, my brain would not need to use as much energy (because it really does not have any to spare).
So, this is where we started.
Chalk board reminder if our Keep It Conditions.
Set some guidelines to help you out with the decision making process of what to keep, donate, or trash. Actually write these down, so that you have something visual to reference. Our guidelines are:
Have I used this in the last year? Will I use it in the upcoming year?
Can it be replaced for less than or equal to $20? Can it be borrowed?
Would I purchase this item again?
Is this living out the purpose for which it was created? Or have I found a better use for this and it is currently doing its job?
Am I keeping it out of guilt?
if I had the opportunity, would I sell it in a yard sale?
My largest collection that sparks joy is my wardrobe. I love my clothing. I do not buy an item of clothing that will not create at least three complete outfits with the clothing items that I currently have. I am truly a curator. 💁🏽♀️
However, I do hold onto my items of clothing for decades. I’m not kidding, I have T-shirts that I wore in the 5th grade. (And yes they do still fit; I went through a very early growth spurt, and then never grew again.)
So some items of clothing are clearly made for a younger person, and I am holding on to them purely for selfish nostalgia. That is where those questions come in. “Could someone else use or love it more?”
Two bags of clothes ready for donation next to Al the avocado plant.
Most definitely, yes.
I feel better knowing that I’ve donated them and somebody else will wear and love them the way they should be loved.
The majority of my newer wardrobe has been left untouched, but a lot of other items have been donated, easing the stress of both me and the bar that holds my clothes!
Onion method is not called The Onion method because it’s stinky and makes you cry, it is because you focus on your house layer by layer. Start with the large items, or the items that you can easily identify that do not belong in that space.
Here are some items I found in my living room.
Left to right: Hair tie, Jack-o’-lantern necklace, mailbox key, kangaroo pencil, camera lense cover.
It is September, so that Halloween necklace has been out for almost a year. How embarrassing! 🤦🏽♀️ But it has a home in the Halloween decoration box in storage. The extra camera cover belongs in the camera bag, the pencil belongs in the office, the hair tie belongs in the bathroom, and the mailbox key belongs in the key bowl. And done! That’s five things already cleaned out of my living space! Small victory, but it feels pretty good.
Starting in the space where the smallest amount of work, makes the most visually impactful change, can be a great kickstarter. We donated a lot of clothes, but we don’t get to admire the closet like the clear space in the living room.
It is the room we hang out in the most as a family. Moving those 5 items made a clear open space that I can admire while the family spends time together. And this can be now more quality time because none of us are distracted by the mess that we are surrounded by.
The 15 minute rule. Limit yourself to 15 minutes at a time. Set a timer, and work consistently for that 15 minutes. If that is all you can manage for that day, it is absolutely fine, you did an amazing job.
Metallic Sandtimer – Not 15 mins.
In the beginning, that’s all I could manage. My body would get fatigued, or I just felt that I could not bring myself to do any more work. But I quickly found myself able to extend that 15 minutes. And not only physically I was able to, but I actually wanted to!
I’m not too sure if simplifying will help me as drastically as others. Regardless, I am sure that the benefits, no matter how small, would be worthwhile.
This is where we will start. I’ll give updates about this journey. I hope you are as excited as we, to find where this experiment brings us!
What is the level of clutter in your house? Do you have any tips on how to simplify that you find helpful? Let us know if you try any of the methods above, and how well it worked for you!
Warning- primitive road. Three adventures, Continue on.
Path unknown, Rocks threaten. Meadow offers rest.
Yellow flowers, Shine as bright as the sun. The pines enjoy both.
Humming bees, Racing by. Unaware it’s vacation.
Domesticated animal, Turns wild. Free as the wind in the trees.
Turkey vultures, Soar. We are not what you are looking for.
Morning cool, Turns afternoon warm. Hikers: thankful for shade.
Large ears turn to listen, She hears no threat. Her hoves saunter on.
Catahoula watches grazers, Very respectful. Good boy.
Four cows, Sixteen stomachs. Understandably you eat all day.
Drifting in the wind, On paper wings. Flutters by.
The butterfly lands, And waves. I wave back.
Sun setting, Storm threatens. It’s thunder shakes the mountain.
Trees sing lullabies. The gently falling rain, Keeps tempo.
The fire dances. It’s movement, Warms three hearts.
Morning fog. Sunbeams kiss wet leaves, Shimmering.
Traveling along – primitive road. Three adventurers, Returning home.
Path now known, Rocks permitting. Meadow wishes best
The American Haiku is a simple three line poem without restrictions of syllables or rhyming. Jack Kerouac revised the Japanese art form in the late 1950’s through the late 1960’s to adapt to Western Culture. To learn more about Jack Kerouac and his Beat Generation, visit http://jackkerouac.com/ website of UMass, Lowell, The Jack and Stella Kerouac Center for the Public Humanities.
Epil(epsy)ogue 
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